Why do I always feel the need to put on lip gloss right before going outside on a windy day? It's as if I actually like having hairy lips or something.

Today is thumb appreciation day, so if you think about it, appreciate your thumb.

Proof it's a small world:

I (in Arkansas) sent a "Save the Date" invitation to my friend in North Carolina, whom I met while studying about in Australia. She put the card on her refridgerator, where her college friend, (who studied abroad in London while we were in Australia) recognized me from our elementary school days in Wilmore, Kentucky (population: 6,000), a place I haven't lived in since seventh grade.

That, my friends, is crazy on so many levels.

5 things I learned this weekend:

1) You apparently really need 2 sets of silverware... or at least, so says the lady at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. In fact, she was adamant about it. You never know when guests are going to look down upon your current set of silverware, so it’s really best to have a set for special occasions.

2) Lacrosse is a brutal sport. I might not be able to see the ball most of the time, but I can sure hear those hits.

3) All of the Batman movies do not connect. Apparently, Batman Begins means everything starts over. Who knew?

4) Kansas really is conservative.

5) If a person yells the s word at a basketball game, the police might warn you, “if you say it again, you’re going to get kicked out,” but what he really means is, “I’m going to throw you out anyway, I’m just going to wait a minute in between this warning and really doing it.” Or at least that’s what happened to the guy standing behind me.

(Not that I am for people who scream obscenities, I think they should be kicked out. I just find it interesting that the police feel the need to warn you, and then a minute later come back up, disregard the warning and go ahead and kick you out anyway.)

HAPPY GROUNDHOG'S DAY.

Punxsutawney Phil declares 6 more weeks of winter. As I haven't had a spring since 2006, I was hoping otherwise, but what the groundhog says goes.

Pardon me, I just feel the need to do a quick rant.

I am not currently a waitress, so I don’t have a “dog in this fight,” so to speak. But I have been a waitress before, and there were two things I’ve learned: Christians were the worst tippers, followed closely by women.

Christians seem a little generic, so let me explain. If you are a beginning waiter, you will probably have to work Sunday lunches. I guarantee this isn’t because the wait staff wants to go to church; it’s because the Sunday crowd from people coming back from church were the fussiest, rudest, smallest-tippers of the week. Waiters hate waiting on the Sunday church crowd, and that, as a Christian, is devestating to hear.

Women might be self-explanatory. I think most waiters groan when the woman ends up taking the check, especially if they are there with little children. I don’t know what it is, but generally speaking, women tip less.

I know there is a standard rule of tipping 10%, but that is only appropriate some of the time. I thought I would just make a few rules as a former waitress and someone who currently eats out:

1) On Friday and Saturday nights, tipping 10% is not appropriate. You should tip at least 15%, and probably 20%.

2) If you are at the table for a long time, lingering after your meal is done, you need to tip way for than 10%. You are occupying a table, and thus costing the waiter money. It’s okay to linger, you just have to make it up to the waiter by giving him the money he would have gotten if another table had come through.

3) If you order an appetizer, tip the price of an entrée. You are saving yourself money, I completely understand the appeal, but it’s just as easy for a waiter to bring out an appetizer as it is an entrée. He shouldn’t be punished because you ordered something cheap.

4) If just a few people are eating, but a big group is there occupying a table, they need to tip too. They aren’t giving the restaurant money for food, but you are using their services, so make up for it with a tip equal to if you had bought food.

I eat out, so I know the appeal. I also don’t know what brought this on, but as a Christian woman, I think it should be the exact opposite.

The other day in class, my teacher informed me and the two people behind me that she would have trouble remembering our names because all of our hair is the same. Although I didn't look back to see, I could agree because I have the hair color of the majority of the population. When I did look back, however, I saw I was on a row of two platinum blondes and a black girl.

My teacher suggested one of us go red. I wonder if that was a hint to just change hairstyles.